Getting Nabbed by the Fuzz or Happy Birthday 37!


I've got her up to 25 miles per hour . . .fasten your seat belts and HANG ON!

Have you ever wondered who that annoying little old lady was that you always seem to get stuck behind in traffic when you’re running late?

Well guess who?  It’s me or, failing that, someone gawd-awful like me.

That’s why when I got a ticket for speeding yesterday — yes, you read that right SPEEDING as in going TOO FAST — I was floored (and flooring it apparently, but I’ll tell you about that part later).

This is so unlike me.

To illustrate my  normal driving habits, here’s the conversation that transpired between my son and I while he was a passenger in my car on a Christmas Eve shopping expedition:

Why is everybody honking?

Well, maybe it’s because you are going a little too slow.

Oh you mean they are honking at me?

I think so, Mom.

And of course I NEVER drive when 37 (my husband) and I are going somewhere.

Why?  Because it makes me mad when he starts complaining that I’m driving too slow.  So to avoid conflict, I just let him drive and then I can complain about how he drives too fast — for I find I’m far more comfortable in the role of complainer than complainee.

Not only do I drive slow, but I’m also a Huge Driving Coward.

I’ve got a “thing” about changing lanes in that I’d rather not.  So I try to get in the lane I think I’m going to need to be in well in advance.  But my planning never pays off.  Usually the lane I think I need to be in is the wrong one — so I have to crowd into the one I actually need to be in at the very last second.

This tends to make people a tad bit  honkish and road ragey.  What I really need is a sign that says “sorry” to hold up when stuff like this happens.

Anyway, getting back to my speeding ticket

Yesterday I was driving down this road that was right next to the freeway. It was just going along beside the freeway but wasn’t actually a part of the freeway in that there was a chain link fence dividing me from the freeway itself.

Naturally, everybody on the freeway was going at least 60 so I guess I just joined in.

It was peer pressure I tell ya!

Next thing you know, I look down at my speedometer and it said 61 (even though the cop said he clocked me at 59 – I didn’t correct him . . . why quibble?)

In my own defense, I only was going 61 for only about  five seconds when I suddenly realized  what I was doing  — and immediately  slowed down to 40 (the speed limit) on my own accord.  I didn’t even see the cop until 30 seconds later when he finally managed to quit eating my dust as it were.

First thing I did was text my son that his old mammy still had it in her and just got nailed by The Fuzz for speeding!

This  boggled his mind enough to make the sting of the upcoming fine hurt just a little less.

As for breaking the news to 37?

Well I figure the ticket should arrive  sometime around his birthday.  And since he has always wanted me to drive faster, I think my speeding ticket might make a very nice birthday gift, don’t you?

Until next time, I love you

25 thoughts on “Getting Nabbed by the Fuzz or Happy Birthday 37!

  1. Going 60 must have felt like 120 to you. And why is your husband called “37”? I hope it’s not because it’s your 37th marriage…Elizabeth Taylor would jealous if she were still alive.

    • Ha! I’ve been married to my husband for 37 years so I just decided to nickname him 37. It was actually my brain, Peanuts, who came up with it. But keep in mind we are talking about a brain who insisted I name it Peanuts, so there you go.

  2. That is a great story! Can’t wait to see if you embrace your inner speed demon and go with the full racing leathers outfit! (That should mitigate 37s reaction to the ticket!)

    Rock on, Linda!

  3. “This tends to make people a tad bit honkish and road ragey. What I really need is a sign that says “sorry” to hold up when stuff like this happens.”
    Linda,
    Let’s go into the “sorry” sign making business. On the opposite side it could read something I’ll just let you imagine. It could be a bit hit, that is until it is outlawed (but that could take a while) Joy

    • I’m with the ‘sorry’ sign idea – you could be onto a winner here. You could have a sideline of other signs such as ‘oops’ or ‘beg your pardon’ or ‘does anyone have a valium – I’m feeling a bit tense’. There’s a whole world of opportunity out there…..

  4. Ha, I’m the opposite. I usually drive when I’m with my husband because otherwise I’ll complain that he’s driving too fast, this way he’ll just complain that I drive the same speed as him.

    • Ha! You’re smart Rae! If I did drive too fast I’m sure I would drive too fast better than my husband drives too fast. And I’d be willing to bet it’s the same with you!

  5. I can relate. I have a car that goes slow on purpose. But a good-ole boy cop was able to ‘clock’ me doing 40 in a 25 mph zone. Slap my wrist and pass the handcuffs. I’ve done my time at a way-too-much-fun (NOT) on-line traffic school and have officially moved on. But I’ve learned to really keep an eye on my lead foot. Enjoy always, T

    • Yeah, I’ve got that online traffic school to contend with now . . . sigh . . .I haven’t ever had to do it for myself but I’ve helped a couple of my kids through it and it really is a punishment of epic proportions.

    • Yes, well I’ll be one of them from now on. I just hope they don’t give out tickets for driving too slow (my husband says they do, but frankly how would he know? He’s never gotten one, I sure!)

    • Thanks Lizzie. It’s weird because all your comments went into my spam. I wonder what is making that happen? I hardly know how to work my blog. But you’re pretty blog savy. Maybe you would know why. Anyway, glad I found them! :)

  6. Well that explains it! I was leaving comments last night and I would hit post and Poof! gone! It got very disheartening and I quit…. :-( but you have answered the conundrum – FB is not letting me share my posts after months of doing it they decided i have a spammy link…..I know which one it is and I guess i’ll have to take off the little sparkly monkey – get the monkey off my back hahaha ok well I will keep commenting then – I thought they were disappearing to fly unmonitered around cyber space and we all know my comments need adult supervision. THanks :-)

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