It Came in the Mail Especially for Little Ol’ Moi!


Hello Dear Readers! Good News. Lookee what I got in the mail!

(No, I didn’t get this arrow, it’s just suppose to be pointing down to what I got.)

The Great Courses want me back! This could only mean one of two things: either they want me back because they somehow found out I hate school, and they think I need to step it up education-wise OR they’ve got me mixed up with somebody else.  I suspect the latter or maybe the former. (I’ve never really known the difference.)

Apparently The Great Courses don’t know I’ve hated school since the second day of first grade. Oh sure, the first day was fun but then a pattern of no fun started developing, and it was all downhill from there on out.

Anywayz, (yeah you heard me Great Courses I said anywayz — you gonna do somethin’ about it?  Yeah? . . .  you and what university? . . . .) Anywayz, like I was saying, apparently it is this guy who thinks I need to take some courses.

This is supposed to be pointing down! This stupid arrow just isn’t working right.

Now I’m not saying that Robert M. Hazen is not as wonderful as he himself thinks he is (and no you may NOT call him Bob), I’m just saying that the look in Robert’s eye is a little unsettling — even if he has deemed himself  to be in the top 1 % of professors in the world.

And how did he go about deeming himself thusly?  Well, it was easy (for him).

First he took the number of teaching awards he has accumulated and divided it by the number of evaluations he’s had published. Then, he took that number or “quotient” (as the top 1% professors call it) and multiplied it by the number of  newspaper write ups featuring none other than  Robert M. Hazen Ph.D, Harvard University! .  . . . Harvard University!  . . . . .Harvard university!  . . . . . university!(Robert was going to get that echo fixed but he’s decided he kinda likes it.)

So what if Robert M. Hazen didn’t ask any of the students who took classes from him what they thought! Who gives a hoot what they think — they’re students . . . ew!

So here’s one of the “Great Courses” Robert is offering for twenty bucks but he’s quick to point out that it is 75% off and which made it $760 originally (arithmetic may vary) .  Here it is:

Oh screw the arrow! Just pretend there’s an arrow here pointing down.

Not only will Robert be teaching what he knows about the unsolved mysteries of the universe, he will, for no extra charge, be teaching everything he doesn’t know about the universe!  A subject about which top 1 % professor, Robert could drone on and on for year and years or his name isn’t Robert M. Hazen Ph.D., Harvard University .  . . . Harvard University!  . . . . .Harvard university!  . . . . . university!

Hey guess what? Robert loves that echo so much he’s decided to get one installed in his house! You go Robert!

Until next time . . . I love you

16 thoughts on “It Came in the Mail Especially for Little Ol’ Moi!

  1. I hope Drawing Lady doesn’t hear about how much you hate classes.
    Or that you haven’t mastered the down arrow yet…

    BANANA……BANAna……..anana……….na
    Echos are fun!

  2. oh – the Drawing Lady is sure to have you in class indefinitely drawing down arrows of all shapes and sizes – shh I won;t tell her. Bob has an very unsettling look I agree..almost like..ug he gives me chills – I just called him Bob to let him know what I think of someone so full of them selves and that way he won;t think he unsettles me.. :-) There is a Veggie Tale song about the Second day of second grade – I can;t remember how it goes tho…

    Why do I keep hearing an echo? SOunds like….banana? ;-)

    • Ha ha! You know what though Lizzie. Don’t you think Bob and the Drawing Lady might make a pretty good match? I mean The Drawing Lady would have him knocked off his high horse in nothing flat! Maybe it would knock that smirk off his face too! Really there’s a Veggie Tale about the second day of second grade? I bet it ‘s cute. (I bet Bob wouldn’t think so though!)

      • oh what a match – yes I think they would be an interesting couple.. every time he gets the smirk or the – its something in his eyes ..she couls just whip out her …pen ..and he would change his expression – I bet he would lighten up and not care if we called him Bob..and after all the Tomato on VeggieTales name is Bob and he has a quite happy look and he is a tomato of God so still a pretty important guy – if it doesn;t have a smirk its not a Robert – If It doesn;t have a smirk its a Bob.. huh.. I have no idea where I was going with that …I have to find the song now… its cute – not really ABOUT the second day of first grade -its about sone clutsy kid who on the second day of first and second and third and so on grade… is..klutzy..? GAh! as if I bneed to e crazier.. ;-)

  3. I always think the mark of a good teacher is when they teach what they don’t know!!! hahaha! Linda, I think you should contact the people at “The Great Courses” and apply for a teaching position, yourself. You could teach, “The Other Side of the Bible.” LOL!! Of course I would expect to get the 75% off the original price, since I’ve already taken the pre-requisites! haha!

    • Hahaha Lisa! Oh wouldn’t that be funny? I could give them all my Bible stories and tell them they were lectures I once gave to a very erudite group of scholars. And Lisa, when they hire me, the first thing I will do is give you, Lily and El Guapo PHDs! In fact, we could even start our own online school of Divinity. We really wouldn’t have to change a thing except maybe the name of our blogs and charge everyone $20 to read them! I think it might work! :D

  4. “The Great Source” sounds like a cult disguised as a college. Tom Cruise is probaly the founder.
    The fact that they are teaching the OTHER SIDE of history is what I’m interested in. I didn’t realize History had sides. Maybe they should say “The Right Angle of History.” I think that sounds more professory don’t you?

  5. And I read that the Scientology people are scouring the globe for a new wife who will be easily programmable for Tom. But the hardest thing is going to be to find a beautiful girl who can be easily brainwashed AND is under 4′ 5″ so she doesn’t tower over Tom more than Katie or Nicole did. I hear there’s a couple of Icelandic fairies that look very promising!

  6. I am also on the Great Courses weekly mailing list, but I purchase courses from them pretty regularly. I’m actually such a fan that I could enumerate their virtues at length (I won’t, not least because you’d begin to suspect this was spam). I make it a point ONLY to spam for knock off v14gra.
    Wanna buy some?

  7. I had a great course once, but it was in a restaurant.

    Here’s the funny part: the waiter was none other than Famous Professor Robert M. Hazen!! He said he got tired of teaching great courses, and decided to serve them instead.

    We left him a tip: a funny red arrow pointing to a penny. : P

  8. I’ve taken a science survey course by Professor Hazen. The guy is actually an awesome teacher. Seriously.

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