Hello Dear Readers and welcome to Fish It From the Archives Friday Even Though It’s Only Thursday. I have something I have to do this morning so I had to rearrange the days of the week a little and make today Friday and tomorrow Thursday. Sorry for the inconvenience! So anyway, have a nice weekend even though it’s not really the weekend!
Bangs
A Professional Golfer . . . In a Way . . .
My husband, 37, got to play in a golf tournament for work (which technically makes him a professional golfer since he got paid for work while he was golfing). So while he was out earning money golfing, I decided I should, at the very least, be spending some of it. Right?
And because 37 isn’t actually a real professional golfer in actual, real professional golfer shape, he came home exhausted and went to bed early, so I didn’t get a chance to show him what I bought – which is just as well. Why? Because I spent a ton of money on make up and men don’t understand makeup.
It Always Boils Down to “Bangs”
Men think they think women look better without any makeup. Ha! Little do they know. If I’m wearing new make up, 37 will probably notice I look a little better; but he doesn’t exactly know why. He thinks maybe it’s because I cut my bangs or something.
So why should I share with him that I just spent $36 on light beige liquid foundation and $25 for concealer and $18 for mascara. It will only make him perplexed. And everybody knows, that people who become perplexed don’t golf very well -; and I wouldn’t want to ruin 37′s golf game now that he’s on the verge of turning semi semi-pro.
Nothing Goes Better with New Makeup Than New Clothes
After I bought some new make up, I stopped off at Ross. I’m always amazed at how much money I spend at Ross even though I’ve never really liked Ross. At Ross, shopping is about as much fun as searching for an insurance file in a huge filing cabinet.
At Ross, shoppers sift through the selections using quick, staccato motions, filing through the racks with efficiency and expertise.
When you come across something a bit promising, you’ll unhook it, give it a split-second perusal and then either return it to the rack or toss it in the shopping cart.
It’s a somewhat enjoyable activity if you happen to find something you like. If you don’t, you’ll leave empty-handed hating Ross just a little more than you did before.
Artists rendering of me shopping at Ross. Sorry I didn’t have time to draw more clothes.
This time I got lucky and found several cute summer-y tops and two pairs of capris and headed over to join the other Ross Love/Haters in the cordoned-off line — which was almost as long as the one I once waited in for Space Mountain and I’ll admit that when I got to the end of the Space Mountain line, it was more fun . . . although I didn’t get to take anything home . . .
The grand total was actually less than I spent on the makeup. Which is what keeps me going back to Ross.
When I put on my new outfit and my new makeup this morning I felt pretty good. I figure it’s just a matter of time now before 37 compliments me on my bangs.
Until next time, I love you
Haha! The line at Space Mountain! Lol!
Why do new clothes and make up cause us to feel so much better? They just do. No sense, I guess, in trying to understand it.
I’m surprised 37 is not a professional golfer since it appears that he has a rubbery, jointless arm. I would think that might be a big help with his swing? Ha!
He actually does kind of look like that and he is a pretty good golfer — it must be the rubbery jointless arms! HA!
I don’t know what it is about make up and clothes. But they certainly do make a difference as to how we feel about ourselves! I’ve always felt kind of sorry for men that they can’t wear makeup — well then again I guess some men are starting to wear manscara — I saw that term floating around somewhere! HA!
I have found that I can waste about 3 hours of my life at Ross and end up spending $60 on four weird swirly design shirts and a pair of pants that don’t quite fit. But hey, it’s ROSS!
I agree with you that men don’t understand makeup (unless they are in the kabuki theater) which means I usually don’t bother showing Tyler any new makeup I purchase. In fact, I believe he thinks I don’t even wear makeup!
LOL honey!!! I think Ross should change their name to “Four Weird Swirly Shirts and A Pair of Pants That Don’t Quite Fit! Hahahahaha! Because that’s what I get every single time I go! It must be hereditary!!
When my girl tells me she bought makeup, my only question is “do you like it?” and when she says “yes”, I say “yay”.
The only question I have from this is DEAR GOD, PLEASE TELL ME YOU DIDN’T PASS YOUR LACK OF ELBOWS TO YOUR CHILDREN!!!!
Haha Guap! Why can men not tell when women are wearing make up but can instantly spot whether the TV is on the HD channel?
Elbow? What is that? Some sort of new internet term?
Men only THINK we look better without make up because they THINK we aren’t wearing it when we really are… Man…THAT was a long sentence. Anyway…Great blog as always Linda…
Muah!!!
Sooz
You are absolutely right Sooz! I wonder what they think is happening when we cry and our Mascara runs. They probably just think we either just have dark circles under our eyes from lack of sleep or maybe some one punched us and gave us two black eyes while they were looking out the window for a second!
HA!
That arm looks more suited to Jai Alai than golf.
When you said Space Mountain, I thought Mount Splashmore – then the theme song. Then of course “Will you take us to Mount Splashmore?” Thank you!
Haha! Well I’ve never see that Simpson’s episode but you can be darn sure I’m going to watch it. Mount Splashmore LOL!
I’ve also never hear of Jai Alai! Had to google that one. Hey thanks for keeping me on my toes Brain! LOL
LOVE your drawings! Darling, you are GORGEOUS without makeup, but yes for sure, they think our skin just looks like this without cleanser, scrub, toner, eye cream, facial cream, night masks, tea tree oil, and the like. Yup. don’t thinkz so…
Hugs! LOVE your drawings! It totally drew me to your post! hAHAH.. Accidental pun.
Hahaha Pink!! You are so right. I think they also think that everything cleans itself and the groceries magically appear in the fridge. Wouldn’t they be surprised to learn the truth? (I think my husband would be surprised to learn that neither he nor I have elbows either! HA!
HAHAHA… Great point! Man, I should be so thankful…
Pink.