The Trifecta Writing Challenge for this week is to write a story between 33 and 333 words using the third definition of the word heal: 3: to restore to original purity or integrity <healed of sin>
How It Is With Santa
Missy Claus tapped her acrylic nails on the glass tabletop and pouted her freshly plumped lips. Her bleached hair hung in carefully divided tendrils, strategically placed to lessen the severity of a face that was heading into middle age kicking and screaming.
She heard her husband, Nick, coming down the chimney and looked over just as his silly boots landed on the grate.
“You’re late!”
“Late for what?” Nick asked.
“Our appointment with the Bravo producers? I know you didn’t forget! You just don’t want me being on a reality show! Admit it!”
“Okay, I will admit it!” Nick said firmly while reaching into his toy bag to see if he had any balls left from last night’s world toy distribution. “I don’t want you being on a Housewives reality show! They symbolize the rampant narcissism that is destroying the world!
“Oh, yeah? Well the Easter Bunny doesn’t think so!” Missy Claus picked up her mirror and admired her false eyelashes. “In fact, I just talked to Flopsy, and she said Peter thinks her being a cast member on The Real Housewives of Legendary Characters will be good for business.”
“But they’re not even married!” Nick interjected. “And yet they had 428 kids just last year! What kind of example are they setting for the world?”
“I don’t know. Who cares about the world?” Missy gazed deeply into her mirror and gently tweaked a tendril. “Besides Flopsy told me most of those kids aren’t even Peter’s anyway.”
“What?” Nick took a step back. All the blood drained from his rosy cheeks. “What do you mean most of those kids aren’t Peter’s?”
“For Godsakes! How naive can you be, Nick? Haven’t you ever noticed that some of those kids have red hair and will only eat Lucky Charms?”
The air was cool as Nick’s sleigh flew across the great northern ice sheets. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.
Flying always helped to heal his soul.
“On Dancer! On Prancer!”
Santa takes some time to think.
Until next time . . . I love you
Now you’ve really done it…Flopsy and Peter….oh no!….Diane
Thanks Dian. Glad you liked the rollicking adventures of “the gang!”
I really enjoyed reading this, Linda! Funny, with vivid characters.
Thanks so much! It was a lot of fun putting together!
Thanks for taking the time to come by and check it out! 
I thin Peter and St Patrick are going to have to find a neutral holiday to meet on.
Arbor Day perhaps?
Oh definitely Arbor Day. That day needs way more drama!
Thanks for the terrific chuckle today – especially liked when he reached into his bag
You are so very welcome ht!
I love the line: “…a face that was heading into middle age kicking and screaming.” I need to remember that one. And I see Flopsy been fooling around and worse yet, they aren’t even married. My boyhood illusions are all shattered. Nicely done.
Well, I guess bunnies will be bunnies, whether they’re famous or not!
Flopsy you dirty little minx!
Never judge a book by it’s cover. No matter how furry and angelic the cover!
Hi,
What a great story, I did enjoy this one, but you have “let the cat out of the bag” concerning Flopsy and Peter, wasn’t that suppose to be a secret?
No wonder poor old Santa had to take to the skies.
Well, that Missy Claus is pretty self-involved. She probably won’t even remember she said that! HA!
This is amazing. I woke up this morning thinking about you and and wondering if you were ever going to come back online. Then I see your comment! ESP is the only thing that explains it! And it’s good to see you back Mags!
Thank You.
Definitely ESP, no doubt.
I won’t be blogging myself until the New Year, it has been a trying couple of months.
During my break from blogging, my Dad had to have a triple by-pass he is 81 so you can imagine the worry, but all is fine, he is doing great. I have moved in to his place until he is fully back on his feet, but I have a bit more free time now and thought I would catch up with everyone before Xmas.
Bless your heart Mags. He’s lucky to have a daughter like you! And I’m so glad to hear that he’s on the mend. How stressful for you both. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas together. I have a feeling it will be really special! And I’m looking forward to your return!
naughty bunnies! i hope Santa recovers from the shock before Christmas!
Oh me too!! Maybe we’ll all find bunnies in our stockings this year!
well my snake would like that! lol
Lol (in the office).
So glad you enjoyed and I hope you didn’t get caught reading blogs! Ha!
428 kids! Funny bunnies!
Fun loving too!
This was great fun! Hilarious.
Thank you Tara. And thanks for taking the time to come by!
Oh, the scandal – 428 bunny kids and they aren’t even married! You’re so good at coming up with these outrageous (and funny) stories
I look forward to it every week, JannaT as I’m sure you do too judging from the wonderful stories you come up with each week!
oooh, i luvv this. has the flavor of the season and how
Thanks rashmenon!
Hey…Really nice…!!!!!
Glad you liked it Kate! Thanks for taking the time to come by!
One reason I really like your writing besides being funny Linda is because you actually make the characters come alive on the page. Great story per usual.
xx
Sooz
Oh what a nice compliment Sooz! Wow! Thank you!
Sounds like Missy Claus is suffering from a bit of cabin fever. And it’s only December. She should try riding along with Santa. Maybe a date night.
Yes, she definitely needs to get out of the house. A little fresh air will do her a world of good!
This was the funniest thing I have read in awhile. Loved it.
Thank you Deanabo! I’m so glad you liked it. It was fun making it up!
I hope that the Lucky Charms guy is ready to pay child support worth 428 bunnies! I also hope you continue this story (or write a part 2) since it was most entertaining!
Well, it was a whole lot of fun to write! And the child support is going to be out of this world! Ha!
This is fantastic
Thank you Silversound7. And thanks for coming by!
The details of that infidelity are hilarious. Sounds like one hell of a tv show!
Haha! I think it would make for some entertaining TV!
Reached into his toy bag to see if he had any balls left. So funny. Leave it to me to choose that particular item. Also love the 428 rabbit kids. Creativity at its highest level, yet again. Terrific!
Oh Stephanie B! I was so happy with the way that line turned out. And it’s so satisfying to know you liked it too! And thank you so much for you kind words. I’m inspired!!
lol and I love you for these delightful little stories (:
Oh thank Draug! What a sweet thing to say! And I love you for your delightful stories — and always look forward to reading them!
I picked this as one of my first reads for this morning – Glad I did.
Thanks for the laugh. The reaching into the toy bag in search of balls was priceless.
Ah . . . that’s so nice to hear! And we all know Santa has balls, I just thought this might be a good time to remind people of that, what with it being the Christmas season and all! HA!
“Who cares about the world??”
I love Mrs. C.– she’s the Anti-Al Gore, and she’s got better tendrils, too! : P
LOL Mark!!! You think they’re better than Al’ tendrils? I mean he forms his by wrapping them around a Funyun every night. He’ll be disappointed to find out they’re not as good as Mrs. C’s. Even if they are more delicious.