What the Scientists Are Thinking About

The Thy Bone is Connected to Something, But What?

Researchers have recently discovered that what was previously thought to be the head was actually the tail. LOL

Researchers who were staring at animal fossils at the Royal Veterinary College taking turns guessing about what the fossilized animals might have looked like have recently discovered, after staring some more, that they might have guessed wrong.

Using 3D models of animal fossil remains, researchers have discovered that the head was actually supposed to be where the tail was and vice versa.

“My bad!” was what Professor John Hutchinson of the Royal Veterinary College should have said but probably didn’t.

The 3D models have also suggested that Professor John Hutchinson may need to reevaluate how he put together fossilized bones of an earlier animal fossil discovery he dubbed the unicorn duck.

Fish Cannot Feel Pain Say Scientists

“Ow! No wait . . . nevermind.”

A group of fish torturers researchers from the University of Edinburgh injected the lips of a rainbow trout with an acid solution causing the trout to rub their lips on gravel and move in a rocking motion suggesting pain.

However, after studying the brains of fish ad nauseam, Professor James Rose from the University of Wyoming has come to the conclusion that fish do not experience pain an any meaningful way.

“The trout’s reactions in earlier studies were not ones of discomfort as they lack the capacity to experience it, ” Professor Rose explained and might have gone on to say, “the trout with the injected acid lips were probably just feeling self-conscious about their appearance.”

“I think that fish welfare is very important,” Professor Rose was quoted as saying between bites of his MacDonald’s Fillet O’ Fish, “but I also think fishing and science is too!” he remembered to add conscientiously.

Why Oh Why Did Viking Settlers Leave Greenland?

“She doesn’t look hungry and sick to us.”
“She’s not hungry and sick, she’s bored.”

Locked in a heated debate of  “your guess isn’t as good as mine”  researchers have been puzzling over why Viking settlers abandoned Greenland at the end of the 15th century.

For years now (nobody knows how many) researchers have been coming into work everyday to bust their humps puzzling over the ongoing task of trying to figure out why random groups of vikings acted the way they acted hundreds and hundreds of years ago.

Researchers used to believe that disease and starvation caused Greenland settlers to return to their ancestral homes, but the most recent puzzling has yielded the idea that maybe settlers went back home because Greenland is just downright boring.

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Until next time . . . I love you

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