Hello Dear Readers! After much coaxing, congealing, and coagulating I am happy to report that I have finally managed to talk The Math Lady into stopping by for a visit.
The Math Lady
She has agreed to help us sharpen our math skills by presenting us with a few story problems. The Math Lady would like us to pick up our pencils now and answer the following problems to the best of our abilities:
Wendy, Jennifer and their friends Enrique, Adonis and Fred are going camping for a week in the Grand Canyon. Enrique is bringing along his pet pig, Howard, who is Enrique’s best friend but who doesn’t care much for Wendy, Jennifer or Adonis. Adonis is bringing his goat, Peppy, and his chicken, Victoria. Peppy and Victoria are best friends with Fred, Adonis, and Wendy, but Jennifer and Howard think they are annoying. (By the way has anybody seen Enrique?) Fred is bringing his duck, George, who isn’t anybody’s best friend due to a rough childhood. How many friends are going camping for a week in the Grand Canyon?
A) Chocolate Pudding
B) One million trillion billion
C) Yes
D) Hey wait! Has anybody seen Enrique?
Wendy, Jennifer and their friends with benefits Adonis and Fred have been camping for a week in the Grand Canyon. Last night while they were all sitting around the campfire, they saw Enrique who weighs 172 pounds fall into the Grand Canyon at a velocity of 150 mph. The backpack he was wearing weighed 28 pounds before he drank the 17 cans of beer contained inside. Each can weighs 13 ounces when full but only 1 ounce when empty. If the wind velocity was 17 mph, how long did it take Enrique to reach the bottom of the Grand Canyon?
A) Chocolate pudding
B) One billion trillion million
C) Yes
D) Hey look, it’s Enrique!
Wendy and Jennifer are each pregnant with triplets. Their doctor says they can only gain 40 pounds each. If Jennifer and Wendy eat one pig named Howard, one goat named Peppy, one chicken named Victoria and one duck named George for a combined calorie intake of 150,328 calories. How many pounds will Wendy and Jennifer weigh when they arrive at the delivery room at 3:52 p.m. Eastern Standard Time?
A) Chocolate pudding
B) One trillion billion million
C) Yes
D) Hey wait. Has anybody seen Fred and Adonis?
And there you have it, Dear Readers! The Math Lady sincerely hopes these story problems have been helpful to you mathematically. Oh, and if you answered A, B C or D to any of the above, please stay after class as The Math Lady would like to have a word with you. Good luck!
Until Next time . . . I love you
Well, the first one I say
E) BBQ roasting (Cackles maniacally)
The second one
D) Hey its Enrique! (Boy did he try to fly)
The third
D) Yeah where did they go?? :O
Oh and you owe me pudding for making me do math
A+ Andrew!! And I am sending you a gallon of pudding. Watch for it in the mail. It will be coming by way of the United States Pudding Service!!
Cheers! Don’t call it an alien invasion this time
Two things: First, did you say “Math Lady” or “Meth Lady?” Second, did the Veggie Lady dress the Math/Meth Lady?
Hahaha!! Oh guess what? The Math Lady has a sister and her name just happens to be The Meth Lady! And thank you very much for the wonderful idea undercover!! The Vegetable Lady is quite the seamstress! You have an eagle eye undercover.
#1 Nine, counting Enrique
#2 B) expressed in nanoseconds
#3 Expressed in packages of chocolate pudding, 437, counting the added ingredients….
Thanks, I always loved word problems….
Oh, if, in the future, you cajole the math lady, I think it will work better than coagulating her….
Ned go to the head of the class!! The Math Lady has a surprise for you. Oh sorry! Too late she’s already coagulated!! Wait now she’s congealing again! She’s so fickle!!
She must be a silicon-based life form, from Uranus (pronounced, yer’uhnuss…). where coagulating and congealing are a way of life, rather than just a hobby… She’s not fickle, she’s pickled, in oxygen!….
Can I stop now? My head hurts….
Hahaha! Yes you may stop now Ned! And pick up a cupcake on your way out!
It looks like the Math Lady’s clothes are becoming as twisted as her word problems! The first one kills me – “How many friends are going camping for a week in the Grand Canyon?” LOLOL!!! And the names, always the names, Adonis and Enrique! haha!
Well those story problems always stumped me when I was in school! not only could I not figure any of them out, I didn’t even know where to begin! They all sounded like they were written by the Math Lady! And I can remember thinking how boring the lives of the people who lived In story problems were. I felt kind of sorry for them. I still do. Poor Enrique!
math? who’s Enrique? Did someone say pudding?
Lol!! Pudding is the magic word of the day Bucky!! Pick up two cupcakes on your way out!!
i’m so doing that?!
I answered a) to all of them! Where’s my chocolate pudding?
Well wait a minute Diane! I thought you had a chocolate pudding tree on your farm? I was hoping to get my chocolate pudding supply from you!
LOL! I’ll have to send you some
Hah! I’ll be waiting with my spoon in hand!
Enrique discovered a still from the 30s at the bottom of the Grand Canyon. It was recently altered to make booze infused chocolate pudding, and he was simply going down there to get a stash to bring back to his friends. He’s a really nice guy.
LOLOL !! I love Enrique! Chocolate pudding booze? Well no wonder everybody ended up in the maternity ward nine months later!!
What’s that Enrique? He says another round of chocolate pudding for all the commenters! Wow you’re right! He really is a nice guy!!
If only there had been a few more choices, I could have spelled “cabbage” with my answers.
Mmm…cabbage pudding…
Ha! It won’t be long before somebody on Top Chef will be making cabbage pudding!
Sounds a lot like…if a train leaves station A going 50 miles per hour and the second train leave station B at 60 miles and hour how long will it take them to meet….. I HATED those questions and in fact never did answer them…lol Diane
Good for you for refusing to do them Diane! I wish I would have done that!! Instead of trying and getting them wrong every single time!!
HA!
These make a lot more sense to me than the horrible things I struggled with in school! I wish I’d thought to answer each one of them “chocolate pudding.”
Me too!! I dont’ think I ever got a story problem right, Linda. except maybe by accident! Ha!