A Bad Case of Pottery Barn Catalog-ism


OK, I admit it, Dear Readers.  I suffer from Pottery Catalog-ism!  This terrible disorder can strike anyone at anytime.  It is characterized by an intense over-interest in the Pottery Barn Catalog for which there is no known cure.

Please rest assured that I do not hold Pottery Barn in any way responsible for my condition.  But until a cure is found, the pages of the Pottery Barn Catalog shall be an endless source of interest to me.  With this in mind, let’s discuss:

Loose fit slip covers!  They’re imported!!

Pottery Barn is offering this “drop cloth loose-fit couch cover” for only $79.00. Nevermind that it took a whole heap of tucking, tugging and twisting as well as wringing, wrestling and wrenching plus a good amount of yanking and yelling (and sometimes even yodeling!) by the entire staff of Pottery Barn professionals made up of 25 designers, 17 craftsmen, 4 jugglers, and a wino who happened to be walking by — to get this thing to look like it’s worth 79 bucks.

Of course, it will look like this the first time somebody sits down on it:

“But I didn’t even lean back!”

But it doesn’t matter, drop-cloth couch slip covers are still cool!  Because why? Why because they’re imported, that’s why!  Which automatically makes them better.

PB doesn’t specify where they have imported them from, but this rustic little cottage in the Ukraine countryside looks  a tad familiar:

“The importers are here! Somebody get the Tide Stick! Hurry!”

 Now, let’s take a closer look at the coffee table shall we?

Pottery Barn is elevating the art of unexpected decor in this Nod-to-Dentistry vignette with its smart smattering of decorative dental instrumentation tastefully arranged in the dish and the re-purposed pickle jar.

And is that a roll of gauze or perhaps a drinking vessel reminiscent of a roll of gauze?  This can only mean one of two things: 1) PB customers are spending way too much money on imported, drop-cloth couch covers and re-purposed pickle jars — forcing them to perform their own root canals — or it’s simply Pottery Barn’s salute to gum disease.

Well shut our mouths, Dear Readers! Leave it to Pottery Barn to put the Causal Living in Rinsing and Spitting.

Until next time . . . I love you

28 thoughts on “A Bad Case of Pottery Barn Catalog-ism

  1. Great post as always! Funny stuff…maybe because it’s so true to life…

    Take care, Linda.
    Skip

    • Haha!! Yes indeed, Skip. I haven’t drank the Pottery Barn Catalog Kood-aid yet. But I don’t think Pottery Barn is ever going to give up on bringing me over to the Pottery Barn Side! :D

  2. Slip covers are the world’s worst invention!! If you can afford a $79 slip cover, you can probably afford a new imported couch but your teeth will be worse for the wear. Thank God PB offers the idea of keeping dental tools handy in a repurposed pickle jar!

    • Haha! I think Pottery Barn’s imaginations have gotten the better of them. I mean they are really scraping the bottom of the decorative creativity barrel when they have to use dental scrapers as decor! :D

  3. Yodeling and sofa throws, If if i didn’t know better Linda. I’d say you’re recreating the Highland games with a touch of dentist room decor! :0

  4. LOLOL!!! Pottery Barn just keeps getting better! A nod to dentistry and a salute to gum disease! When I think of home decor I always think of oral care. Maybe they’ve decided to offer free dental x-rays with each $79.00 slip cover? Maybe Grams demanded a dental feature?

    • Ha! Just between you and me and Pottery Barn, I think Grams is behind the dental decor. I think she’s got a thing about gums now that she’s so up close and personal with her own! Maybe Grams is short for Grandma Gums?

  5. OH MY GOD!!! Pottery Barn is using my dentist’s office for their catalog cover!!!
    Now I know why it’s so expensive.
    On the bright side, the decor is more mind-numbing than novocaine!

  6. As a Ukrainian dentist and Death Shroud manufacturer, I fail to see the humor in your article. The thieves also stole my fish tank and a small tree.

    • I’ve been waiting my entire life for an opportunity to have a reason to begin a sentence with:

      “As a Ukranian dentist and Death Shroud manufacturer,”

      And you beat me to it . . .sigh. . . .is there not justice in the world?

      That does it, I’m going to go out a steal a small tree!

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