Dear Readers. I love thumbing through magazines of every kind: old, new, big, little, digested, undigested. I’ve always thought it would be fun to start up a magazine of my own. So I put My Brain Peanuts to work on it, and, Dear Readers, I think you will agree that Peanuts came up with an idea for a magazine that has a lot of potential!
Peanuts simply took a prestigious magazine like the Smithsonian:
And combined it with a cutting-edge style magazine, such as Elle:
Of course no magazine is complete without a staff of writers. The vision of my brain, Peanuts is to have Sm Elle Magazine written by the most important, Über-sophisticated, magazine writers of the 21st Century. Here’s My Brain Peanuts’s fantasy writing staff for Sm Elle Magazine:
Carreen La Leelee La Pew
Lifestyle Editor, Carreen, has been dramatically flitting to and fro between Paris and London ever since first learning how to flit at the tender age of three. In her travels, Carreen literally inhales cutting-edge lifestyle trends– and exhales them upon the very latest, cutting-edge version of her Apple Ipad.
When asked why, at such a young age, Carreen has made it to the pinnacle of magazine-writing sophistication, she explained in third person, “Carreen La Leelee La Pew his risen to the top by utilizing french words like brioche and chignon in every single sentence.
Owen Henry Charles Buckingworth, III
With a track record of not liking a single meal since 1994, Mr. Buckingworth’s taste in sophisticated cuisine — as well as his actual taste buds themselves — are so hard to please, he has only been actually full once in his life after a particularly well-done mac and cheese dinner his mother (of all people!) prepared for him when all the stars aligned on November 2, 1994 at 2:45 p.m. Eastern Standard Time.
Owen Henry Charles Buckingworth, III credits his journalistic tendencies to his junior high school English teacher, Mr. Blump, who encouraged Buckingworth to enter an International Punctuation Contest, and Buckingworth took home the Winner’s Trophy — by accident — but still!
Health and Beauty Editor
For such an important and influential writer in the field of health and beauty, Carla Rothchild-Doink believes in keeping a low profile. Literally. Consequently Ms. Rothchild-Doink has never been photographed standing up.
“One’s profile is the side-view of what a person looks like from the side.” Ms. Rothchild-Doink is fond of saying and goes so far as to call this her “signature saying.”
In addition to dedicating her life to eating healthy foods, getting enough exercise, and brushing her hair a 100 times before going to bed, Carla Rothchild-Doink can be found on her days off, crawling on her hands and knees in the ocean thus keeping her hands and knees as soft as, but a little more puckered than, a baby’s.
Well, there you have it, Dear Readers! My brain, Peanuts, fantasy magazine!
Until next time . . . I love you